water's getting cold, body's growing old you're high out of your mind, in the bath at morning time when i left for work, ya gave me an emotionless smirk you were readin' the art of war, i just scoffed on my way outta the door out of the door a true rock n roll suicide, lover what were ya tryin to hide what is behind those wild eyes i'm growing tried of the disguise laid down my weapons, threw my arms to the sky to prove to you my trust and there's no need to fight but the idea of loving me, meant facin' insecurities but your reflection so threatening, i just became the enemy oh i became the enemy you set your sights on me oh i am the enemy oh i am the enemy and so the war was on, and so the war was on and the war was on and the war was on...

tell me, tell me, tell me more all those ideas that i adore how you're gonna take care of me how you're gonna set me free x2 hey hey you remind me of somebody hey i know, it's my daddy treat me like your little girl you're gonna teach me all about the world as if i couldn't do it myself as if i actually needed your help but you lied, you lied, i didn't know enough to see it at the time but those eyes, those eyes, darling i was hypnotized cos i was troubled youth and you appeared to know some truth but you were just insane and i let ya into my brain cos we were not in love we were more so havin fun til it came to a quick end when ya tore my heart to shreds ya kicked me out, ya kicked me out as if i had something to be sorry about and i believed, and i believed cos your strings were still attached to me you knew just what you were doin i'm just mad i didn't beat ya to it and how long till the spell is lifted i said help me, help me i'm in love and it's toxic x3

today you fucked me black and blue our bodies glistening through hot summer air then a haunting feeling swept through the room and little did ya know i began to shed tears into your hair i couldn't let ya know, ya couldn't see me weak so i pulled ya in closer and i screamed fuck me i buried the sobs inside of the moans cos our bodies were entwined but i still felt, i still felt so alone i knew it was a bad idea to come here but it was just that i missed ya so much my dear that i would even let ya use me up for once last chance to feel your touch and i don't know what was in it for you cos you weren't the type who needed regular fuel all that i know is that it left me confused when i got dressed and left and left, that afternoon i remember my father said, whiskey and water was the best way to go so when i'd get sad i would pour myself a glass and sip on it nice and slow and the warmth crawled like spiders that were all set on fire through my chest into my gut and some scene that i drew in my head once of you fizzles out just enough, just enough, just enough i got so torn up some nights i'd go out looking for a fight or maybe just someone to take home it was all just temporary but it made it all left scary than having to be alone and though it wasn't you i simply just had to make do a warm body to fill the space but it was you that i loved, i truly couldn't stand someone sleepin where you used to lay, used to lay, used to lay but you made things this way x3 that's why this will never work.. cos you never kept your word no you never never never kept your word

The days seem to just float on by taking on each of them one at a time doin what ya can to make ya feel fine and chasin the moments that make ya feel alive got coffee with my sister a few days ago we chatted inside and gazed out the window and somewhere in that little cafe's glow i found some sort of sense of home got together with some friends to jam some tunes we were shreddin, we were rockin to that rock n roll blues the ecstatic sound rose up and filled the room till it washed over me and made me brand new and some days i like to spend my time all alone blow through a deck of smokes and turned off my phone go for a walk and maybe write myself a song in my own company i always feel like i belong and somedays i think about callin my dad but then i worry it just might go bad though i love him still he just ain't the same man he said he was afraid ti fail to me but i don't think he ever did till he gave up on bein the best that he can when i was a kid i wanted to play with the boys i had spidey action figures and dinosaur toys they always told me that i wasn't allowed but i never stopped trying i was too damn proud and in middle school i always tried to look my best and hoped to catch some boys attention not sure why, they never gave me any before guess that i was still sad about the dinosaurs then in all my years from high school and on i searched for validation in men who were wrong they all tried to possess me and then they'd run away guess they couldn't stand a woman with something to say but it's ok cos i'm doing things my way my way i'm doing it my way

insensitive, oh so repetitive the same old tune, always coming from you and how old it is, the one sided victim schtick you always point the blame, but never use your own name you think you're something huh, you won't admit it but i see it in your walk oh i could see it in your talk but babe do i got some news for you baby you aint shit baby you aint shit and you can suck my fucking clit oh cos baby you ain't shit and why would i, want to spend most of my time listening to your silly rants id rather be in your pants woah oh oh not trying to be rude but i kinda thought you were the dude i think i watched my porn when we were dating that back when i was single hey hey, hey hey hey and on dinner sates, you'd always sit on your phone with nothing to say man how fucking lame, i think a brick wall would of made a better mate and before ya left for work, you were always such a jerk i'd try to kiss you goodbye but you'd say i was taking up your time never appreciated my art, insulted everything close to my heart you just grinded me down into little pieces till i bowed so how do you expect a woman to not act like a crazy bitch when she's madly in love with you but you refuse to let her in you were lazy, you didn't care there was nothing real to share what a sad and washed up shell loving you made my life hell so you can keep blaming me but wake up and smell the coffee you were fucked up from the start cos you got a frozen heart so yeah i am gonna be fine, but i think you're wasting your time cos not feeling anything is no way to be alive (this is a verse from Sonic Youth's "The Diamond Sea" it rang true to me at the time) and time takes its crazy toll mirror fallin off the wall ya better look out for that looking glass girl cos she's gonna take ya for a fall